Off My Noodle

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Releasing My Inner Coupon-Clipper

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The recession has forced a lot of us to face some cold, hard lessons - colder than the cash we wish we still had before the economy was put on the disabled list. For instance, the next time anyone tries to sell me on a supposedly “safe” financial instrument, I’m going to tell that person the only financial instrument I’m relying on these days is a tuba. After all, a tuba is large enough to hold many dozens of dollar bills, and I’ve yet to hear of anyone masterminding a Ponzi scheme involving payoffs of wind instruments. Given the rash of such schemes in the news recently, I can imagine how many people are slapping themselves on the forehead and exclaiming, “I would still have had my savings, if only I had invested in a French horn!” (If you have less to sock away, an oboe would do.)

Fortunately, there are always bright spots even in tough times, and I’m here to point some of them out. (At the same time, I am mustering all my self-restraint from saying, “See, I told you so!” about the dire consequences for the country if I lost my underdog bid for president, which I wrote about last year. Many of you assured me via email or in greetings at the market that I had your vote, so please understand, I am not blaming you. But let’s just say that under a Gruen administration, there would have been no talk of seizing control over giant swaths of the economy when the government can’t even manage an orderly transition to a digital TV switch.)

But I digress. Our topic was finding bright spots in an otherwise slumping economy, and I have found one in rediscovering the joy of coupon redemption. Frankly, I am now ashamed that I used to be cavalier about such money-saving devices - except for those precious 20 percent off coupons for Bed, Bath & Beyond, a store I never enter if not armed (and therefore dangerous) with a stack of them, carefully squirreled away over the months. Coupons for humdrum items, such as mayonnaise, car washes, or even free shipping for mail-order items struck me as so much paper clutter or email distraction that I usually ignored. No more: I even have a coupon for a teeth-whitening center that’s offering a deal to pay for whitening the upper choppers, and they’ll throw in the lowers at no extra charge! 

Alas, the days when I ignored coupons are as dim a memory as those when you could call a customer service representative from the phone company and actually reach somebody in the very same continent who hadn’t learned English as a second language in a Third-world country. They are as distant as the days when you could use the Sunday Los Angeles Times as free weights for bicep curls, and when airlines still offered meals and baggage check for no extra charge. In other words, those days are gone, bubelehs.     

True, my avid use of coupons has only saved me $47.19 so far, but I still feel empowered about making a small difference in covering the rather formidable overhead of a household of six, four of whom require private school tuition. I have also discovered that the flowers from our own back garden look pretty, in a humble sort of way, in a vase on the dining room table. What my own floral arrangements lack in elegance, they more than make up for in saved shekels.
I’m also more careful not to waste leftovers in these lean times, but it takes skill, a few bottles of sauce and a thesaurus to make it work. Trust me, no one finds the invitation,  “Come to the table for leftovers!” an urgent calling. Instead, I’ve been trying to think like a clever corporate marketer and rebrand leftovers by giving them new, inventive names. The other night, I cut up a bunch of leftovers, threw a sauce over it, and voila! It became a ragout. Toss some noodles on another dish and bingo! It’s tetrazzini time! Before long, you’ll get really good at this, and no one will be the wiser. 
There are other things to be cheery about, too, such as chocolate. Even today’s fussy, gourmet kinds that boast 72% pure cacao remain an affordable luxury that not only send your taste buds to heaven - it releases endorphins, which make you feel good and even more importantly, give you the kind of mental energy you need to think up a new name for tomorrow night’s leftovers.

(Adapted from an article that appears in the May issue of Jewish Life magazine.)

Posted by judy @ 02:54 PM • (54) Comments